Names that are better than "iSnack 2.0"

NY Times: Vegemite Contest Draws Protests

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 17:34:24 -0500

NY Times: Vegemite Contest Draws Protests :

What do you get when you take an iconic food product, change its ingredients and release it under a kitschy new name, prompting cries of outrage and a storm of media coverage: A marketing failure or a publicity coup?

Buy iSnack 2.0

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 16:57:09 -0400

Buy iSnack 2.0:

No iSnack 2.0 where you live? Get a commemorative jar online while stocks last.

Cheesybite?

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 01:18:09 -0400

Vegemite Cheesybite? Get stuffed. Apparently two thirds of voters agreed with me, but it was Cheesybite which carried the day.

Single-choice voting? This is Australia - where was our preferential runoff system? Why wasn’t the AEC called in to run the election?

Oh, and why didn’t Kraft check “Cheesy Bite” as two words? It’s a Pizza Hut trademark - see picture below:

Anyway. I’m not a lawyer. Maybe it’s no big deal?

Vote for Vegemate!

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 05:38:00 -0400

So, having admitted its mistake (or was it on purpose?!), Kraft has set up an online poll for Australians to vote for their preferred name to replace iSnack 2.0.

The six names, in alphabetical order, are:

VEGEMITE CHEESYBITE
VEGEMITE CREAMYMATE
VEGEMITE SMOOTH
VEGEMITE SNACKMATE
VEGEMITE VEGEMATE
VEGEMITE VEGEMILD

We here at iSnack2.com are endorsing Vegemite Vegemate as the new name. Incidentally, you can buy a Vegemate t-shirt here for just $29.99.

Vote in the poll here.

I wonder if the iSnack 2.0 would sound shit. (Maybe it would...

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 23:14:04 -0400

I wonder if the iSnack 2.0 would sound shit. (Maybe it would only play brown notes?)

Thanks to @areyouadam for the image!

Kraft: We admit the new Vegemite name sucked and we’re changing it

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 01:31:40 -0400

Kraft: We admit the new Vegemite name sucked and we’re changing it:

Kraft Foods Australia/New Zealand has today announced that it will change the name of the new Vegemite.

Since the new Vegemite hit supermarket shelves in July 2009, Australians and New Zealanders have been invited to come up with a name for the new product; just as Australians did when Vegemite was first launched in this country in 1923.

More than 48,000 name suggestions were received, and from this one name was chosen – Vegemite iSnack2.0. And whilst consumers have been suggesting names, more than 3 million jars of the new Vegemite have been sold.

Since the announcement of the new Vegemite name at the AFL Grand Final, Kraft Foods has heard consumers’ like the taste; they just don’t like the name.

Kraft Foods Australia/New Zealand Head of Corporate Affairs, Simon Talbot, said: “We have been overwhelmed by the passion for Vegemite and the new product. The new name has simply not resonated with Australians. Particularly the modern technical aspects associated with it.

“At no point in time has the new Vegemite name been about initiating a media publicity stunt. We are proud custodians of Vegemite, and have always been aware that it is the people’s brand and a national icon.

“Our Kraft Foods storeroom currently has thousands of jars of the iSnack2.0 named Vegemite. This product will be distributed around Australia, and will continue to be sold in supermarkets for months to come – until Australia decides upon a new name.”

“Australians and New Zealanders will shortly be invited to help us make a choice. Please bear with us for the next 48 hours as we finalise how Australians and New Zealanders can decide the new name through an independent popularity vote. ”

Details of this will be announced on Friday 2 October.

iSnack reThink onThe cArds

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 01:13:22 -0400

With some half a million iSnack2.0 jars set to start going on sale today, US-based Kraft is currently investigating the mechanics of how it could change the name of iSnack2.0

iSnack2.0 fury prompts naming rethink

Hitler finds out about iSnack 2.0

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 22:36:13 -0400

Hitler finds out about iSnack 2.0

You’ve read the blog, now buy the t-shirt! This original...

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 21:40:57 -0400

You’ve read the blog, now buy the t-shirt! This original “Vegemate” tshirt, designed by yours truly, is a great way to express your love of our country and our favourite snack. Just $29.99 - order now!

methuselahmedstudent: “One word:...

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 20:01:33 -0400

methuselahmedstudent: “One word: Poochie.”

Couldn’t agree more. Let’s hope iSnack 2.0’s planet needs him.

iSnack 2.0 on Twitter

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 19:41:00 -0400

iSnack 2.0 on Twitter:

Tips for the correct use of iSnack 2.0, including:

Burning sensations? Look for me at your local pharmacy.

Dab a little of me under your kids arms each morning to ward off pedophiles.

Added to kibble, I will express your dog’s glands.

Via @clintonduncan and @ivanamartinovic, a whole packet of funny...

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 19:30:58 -0400

Via @clintonduncan and @ivanamartinovic, a whole packet of funny iSnack 2.0 images - see the full set here.

Other great names for new Vegemite spreads

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 19:02:21 -0400

clembastow:

Feel free to use these, Kraft. You can have them. Like iSnack 2.0, they’re totally fresh and now:

‘Betamaximite’

‘Laser Disclicious’

‘Sensurround-Lite’

‘Diet Coke With Lemon’

Deep inside Kraft Foods Australia...

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 17:54:12 -0400

It is August 2009. Kraft Foods Australia Marketing Director, Michael Magee, is pacing the corridors with his underling, Ted.

You know, it’s only a month until the AFL Grand Final, Ted. You know what that means, don’t you?

It means… Collingwood needs to pick up its game?

No, you deadshit, it means we’re running out of time to pick a new name for that watered-down Vegemite we’ve been pedalling for months. There are ads to write, jars to decorate, website domains to register!

Oh… you are right, it is kind of watered-down. What about ‘Vegemite Light’?

God, if only we could get away with that. This, this ‘Vegemite II: Son of Vegemite’ has more fat, more sugar, more sodium… and less Vitamin B, less taste, less class.

But the original Vegemite was a name selected from public entries, wasn’t it? Isn’t that working this time?

Folk these days aren’t as smart as they were in 1928. Personally, I blame television.

And a diet rich in saturated fats?

Yes, and a diet ri- hey, hey, I’m not even going to think that, not even in private. Geez, the entries have been atrocious. Most of them either start with “Vege-” or end with -mite”. Then there are the ridiculous ones, like “Cheesewax”. We literally haven’t received a single decent entry. But… what if we weren’t looking for a decent entry?

I don’t follow you.

Of course you don’t, you cotton-headed numpty. Sure, we could just pick the least-worst name, and call it that. And we’d have some sort of mediocrity to live with for the rest of the product life. OR, we could pick something completely stupid and inappropriate, something that will make everyone sit up and say, “What the fuck?” A product name that will span the generations as one of the most terrible ever conceived. At least that way we’ll get some attention, create a buzz, and go down in a blaze of glory.

Michael… there is one entry. One I’ve been saving.

Oh? Let’s see it, my boy.

BRILLIANT!

Media roundup

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 20:26:48 -0400

Sydney Morning Herald:

Simon Talbot from Kraft Foods said: “The name Vegemite iSnack2.0 was chosen based on its personal call to action, relevance to snacking and clear identification of a new and different Vegemite to the original. We believe these three components completely encapsulate the new brand.”

It’s pretty clear that Simon’s arse completely encapsulates his head.

The Sunday Telegraph:

Fox Stapleton proves that the new spread is still tasty, no matter what it is called.

Also that poor name choices aren’t confined to snack foods.

RT @helenrazer: ‘How could iSnack 2.0 win the Vegemite...

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 20:13:00 -0400

RT @helenrazer: ‘How could iSnack 2.0 win the Vegemite Name-Me competition?! What did the other participants suggest? “Pooh in a Jar”?’

iNfringement 2.0

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 06:05:00 -0400

A tip via Tobias:

“Just thought you’d appreciate the fact that some company trademarked the name ‘iSnack’ around 9 years back.”

Not just any company! Australian trade mark 836057 reads:

Word: iSnack
Registered from: 22 May 2000
Owner: Breville Pty Ltd

(IP Australia’s Trademark search has the full details, but you’ll need to search for iSnack first.)

I’m sure Breville won’t mind sharing their trademark with another corporation!

Update: As pointed out in the comments, Breville’s trademark is for a different class of product. So maybe Kraft did something right.

Anything.

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 03:13:15 -0400

Literally anything.

Spreadgemite

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 03:07:22 -0400

It’s spreadable Vegemite, after all.

(Hey, this blog is Names that are better than “iSnack 2.0”, not Good Names for the New Vegemite. Because I doubt there ARE any good names for it.)

Dean-O-Mite

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 02:35:00 -0400

“iSnack 2.0” is the ~~brainchild~~ brainfart of Western Australia’s Dean Robbins. He loves the stuff - look, he’s even left a little bit on his chin:

Should have just named it after himself, seeing as he’ll be forever associated with it anyway.